You Can't Love Someone Out of Shutdown: the Partner's Guide to Love & Self-Regulation

When your partner is in shutdown, you're not just watching it happen—you're in it too. This episode is for the partners who feel like they're losing their person, who don't understand what's happening, and who wonder if they're making it worse. In this episode, I break down: What shutdown actually looks like (and why it's not a choice) What you CAN'T control (and why that matters) 4 concrete ways to influence the situation without trying to fix them The myth of co-regulation and what it actually means How to regulate yourself so you can show up differently Why healthy boundaries aren't selfish—they're essential What your real job is as a partner in shutdown The invisible pain on both sides is real. You're not failing. You're not weak. And you're not alone. 🤩 Ready to go deeper? Explore resources at every price point—from free content to 1-on-1 coaching. Whether you're just beginning or ready for transformation, there's something designed for where you are right now. 👉 Visit 😬 Need to catch up? Listen to the Polyvagal 101 audio series - ✅ Crisis resources: National Suicide Prevention Hotline - 1 (800) 273-8255 National Domestic Violence Hotline -1 (800) 799-7233 LGBT Trevor Project Lifeline - 1 (866) 488-7386 National Sexual Assault Hotline - 1 (800) 656-4673 Crisis Text Line - Text “HOME” to 741741 Call 911 for emergency This and other content produced by Justin Sunseri (“JustinLMFT”) (i.e; podcast, YouTube, Instagram, etc.) is not therapy, not intended to be therapy or be a replacement for therapy. Nothing in this creates or indicates a therapeutic relationship. Please consult with your therapist or seek for one in your area if you are experiencing mental health symptoms. Nothing should be construed to be specific life advice; it is for educational and entertainment purposes only. Justin Sunseri is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist registered in the State of California (#99147). Don't forget to

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You Can't Love Someone Out of Shutdown: the Partner's Guide to Love & Self-Regulation is an episode from Stuck Not Broken by Justin Sunseri.

This episode is 25:14 long.

This episode was published on Mar 31, 2026.

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