Deep Dive: The Anxious Attachment

In today’s episode we are diving deep into the ambivalent attachment style, where it comes from, how it shows up in your relationships and how you can start rewiring it. If you often feel like you’re too much and not enough or constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop in relationships, this one is for you. Understanding Attachment: o Attachment is a biological system, its innate. o Attachment is developed within relationships o People with adverse childhood experiences, experience higher levels or incidences of insecure/anxious attachment. o Internal working models (blueprint)- patterns of relating are internalised = how we relate to others. We have a pro-social system – our system wants to return to secure attachment so it’s possible for everyone. Attachment styles are designed to; maximise available care provided by the caregiver and limit the level of distress. We dive into the following: The Ambivalant Attachment Style develops when there is inconsistency in the way the caregiver responds to the child. The Fear of Being Left •How it shows up in adult relationships •The loop: fear > control > guilt > shame Rewiring & Repair Nervous system!!! -Corrective experience of being present with love and connection -Secure attachment rituals – e.g. before bed connection and rituals because that can be a separation too. Greetings!! Our systems are delicate and responsive and that’s a strength too -Learn how to make requests in a positive way (no shame/blame) -The story I’m telling myself about being unloveable -Notice caring behaviours without deflection Let us know if you'd like more attachment episodes!! You can find more of us here: Our Online Psychology practice: Did you know we have online appointments available with our amazing therapists Lisa or Maddie. Learn more here The Thriving Therapists: To connect with a safe and supportive community of like-minded therapists, head to our Thriving Therapists Facebook group: Or find us on our Instagram: The Psychology Sisters Instagram The Psych Collaborative instagram Please note: this episode is for informational purposes only and does not replace personalised psychological advice.

You can listen to Deep Dive: The Anxious Attachment online on Radio and Podcast. Open the player on this page to stream the available audio.

Deep Dive: The Anxious Attachment is an episode from The Psychology Sisters by The Psychology Sisters.

This episode is 48:21 long.

This episode was published on Jun 12, 2025.

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