224 - Getting The Avoidant To Choose You Is Not A Flex

You know that electric, addictive chemistry we chase? Girl, it’s not love. It’s a nervous system hook. And we all think that if we can just get the avoidant man or woman to settle down, to pick us, to choose us, to see our worth, that everything will be okay. I call this Shiny Object Syndrome (‘I’ll be happy when’)... but today, I explain why 99% of the time, these people will never give you the intimacy, safety, or emotional consistency you deserve. I share my own story of being hooooooked on an avoidant man who felt like an actual drug and what happened when I finally saw through it and saw him for the reality of who he was. I also share the psychology, biology and attachment patterns I learned about on the way and how getting the avoidant person to choose you doesn’t fix your own wounds. Finally, I chat self abandonment, nervous system rewiring, and how to break the cycle for GOOD. Cos damn, it feels good, but trust me, that avoidant man or woman is just casually going to waste 1 - 4 years of your life. And at some point, you’ll get tired of the cycle.💌 Your 7 day free trial to Daily Devotion Wellness: HERE. 💌 If this episode hit something deep in you - if you’re tired of being hooked on people who can’t give you safety, intimacy, or consistency - then this is where you begin to break the cycle. Inside Daily Devotion, you’ll learn the nervous system tools, somatic rituals, and daily practices to stop abandoning yourself and start choosing emotional availability over emotional adrenaline. 💌 DM me if this episode hit you: @iamlouiserumball 🤍 FOLLOW LOUISE / HEALING HONEYS 🤍 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You can listen to 224 - Getting The Avoidant To Choose You Is Not A Flex online on Radio and Podcast. Open the player on this page to stream the available audio.

224 - Getting The Avoidant To Choose You Is Not A Flex is an episode from OPENHOUSE with Louise Rumball and leading therapists by Louise Rumball.

This episode is 40:27 long.

This episode was published on Sep 15, 2025.

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