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Why does it feel so disappointing to ask for what you want? In this episode, we unpack the hidden belief that “if I have to ask, it doesn’t count” — and how that mindset turns simple needs (compliments, celebration, affe...
If I Have To Ask, It Doesn't Count is an episode from Relationship Advice by Colter Bloxom. Why does it feel so disappointing to ask for what you want? In this episode, we unpack the hidden belief that “if I have to ask, it doesn’t count” —...
This episode belongs to Relationship Advice.
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Published Feb 28, 2026, 53:34 long, audio available.
Why does it feel so disappointing to ask for what you want? In this episode, we unpack the hidden belief that “if I have to ask, it doesn’t count” — and how that mindset turns simple needs (compliments, celebration, affection) into silent resentment. We explore the shame, fear of failure, childhood triggers, and meaning-making underneath it all — and how shifting from mind-reading to curiosity can completely change the dynamic. Main Talking Points: • Mind-reading myth • Meaning-making traps • Shame & fear • Childhood wounds • Process > content Give Me Discounts! Check out Relationship Academy! Cozy Earth - Black Friday has come early! Right now, you can stack my code “IDO” on top of their sitewide sale — giving you up to 40% off in savings. These deals won’t last, so start your holiday shopping today! Beducate - Use code relationship69 for 65% off the annual pass. AG1 - AG1 has become my go to every morning. Simple Practice - If you're in mental health and not using simple practice then what are you doing??? Spark My Relationship Course: Get $100 off our online course. Visit SparkMyRelationship.com/Unlock for our special offer just for our I Do Podcast listeners! Skylight - Use code “IDO” for $30 off your 15 inch calendar. If you love this episode (and our podcast!), would you mind giving us a review in iTunes? It would mean the world to us and we promise it only takes a minute. Many thanks in advance! – Colter, Cayla, & Lauren Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
You can listen to If I Have To Ask, It Doesn't Count online on Radio and Podcast. Open the player on this page to stream the available audio.
If I Have To Ask, It Doesn't Count is an episode from Relationship Advice by Colter Bloxom.
This episode is 53:34 long.
This episode was published on Feb 28, 2026.
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If I Have To Ask, It Doesn't Count is from Relationship Advice by Colter Bloxom.
Published Feb 28, 2026 and 53:34 long