Understanding your nervous system in conflict with the authors of Beyond Difficult

Send us Fan Mail If you’ve ever wondered why you become a different version of yourself during conflict… this episode is going to change the way you see those moments forever. I’m sitting down with psychologists and authors Rachel Samson and Dr. Jessie Stern to unpack the science beneath conflict: your attachment history, your temperament, your nervous system sensitivity, and how all of this shapes the way you argue, withdraw, pursue, or shut down. This episode is not about “how to argue better.” It’s about understanding why you show up the way you do in the first place. You’ll learn why some of us chase repair desperately… why others shut down to survive the moment… and why conflict can feel like it happens faster than your ability to think. We also talk about emotional flooding and the moment when your nervous system takes over the conversation before your communication skills even get a chance. And if you are a parent, you will hear how this shows up not only with your partner but also with your child and what you can do starting today to interrupt the cycle. You will walk away from this episode with clarity, hope, and self compassion because conflict is not just about skills. It is about state. Get their new book on Amazon here . Follow Rachel on Instagram Follow Dr. Jessie on Instagram Read our new blog post: The Science Behind How you Show up in Arguments here Support the show Do you find yourself reacting in ways you wish you could change when your child is upset? Learn how to stay calm, manage your emotions, and respond in a way that actually helps your child. Get your FREE emotional awareness training for parents and kids below (comes with a poster, workbook and video): Or purchase our course, join the next 8 week group cohort in April 2026 below:

You can listen to Understanding your nervous system in conflict with the authors of Beyond Difficult online on Radio and Podcast. Open the player on this page to stream the available audio.

Understanding your nervous system in conflict with the authors of Beyond Difficult is an episode from Curious Neuron by Cindy Hovington, Ph.D..

This episode is 36:15 long.

This episode was published on Nov 3, 2025.

Yes. Use the heart button on the episode page to add it to your favorite episodes list.

Yes. This page shows related episodes from Curious Neuron when more episodes are available from the podcast feed.