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Waking Up to Narcissism

Tony Overbay LMFT

Real stories of people in, and out of relationships with people who may be struggling with narcissistic traits, to full-blown narcissistic personality disorder.

Episodes

20 of 171 episodes

We're All Emotionally Immature. Some Are Narcissists. Which Are You?

Narcissistic personality disorder vs. emotional immaturity: what separates the two, and why that difference shapes how you heal. On Greg and...

1:43:32Oct 8, 2026

Why Good People Defend Leaders (and Others) Who Contradict Themselves: Identity, Bias & Belonging

Why do smart, thoughtful people believe such different things? Authority bias, confirmation bias, and belonging shape what we believe long b...

0:52:37Sep 24, 2026

Death By 1,000 Cuts Pt. 12: Stopping at an Invisible Fence

Narcissistic relationship patterns can teach you where to stop, long after anyone has to correct you. Installment 12 of Death by 1,000 Cuts...

1:06:11Sep 18, 2026

Stuck in the Messy Middle: Grief, Divorce, and Emotional Immaturity - Live Q&A with Tony Overbay

Was it narcissistic abuse, or were you the problem? Why does the fog lift after a divorce, and you still can't trust your own judgment? In t...

1:17:27Sep 10, 2026

The Relationship Episode Everyone Needs to Hear: Why We Explain Instead of Understand

When someone you love tells you, “Something you did hurt me,” what happens inside of you next? Do you become curious about what it was like...

1:15:22Sep 4, 2026

The Unicorn Might Have Rabies: How Anxiety Keeps You "Safe" - Live Q&A

What do you do when you finally have language for your in-law's emotional immaturity (or dare I say narcissistic behaviors) — and your spous...

1:06:15Aug 25, 2026

Taking the Long Way Home: Homer as Your Therapist, The Odyssey as Your Map

Emotional maturity takes the long way home, and Homer's Odyssey has been quietly showing the way for 2,800 years. Underneath Christopher Nol...

1:07:09Aug 14, 2026

“Killed Them All, Of Course": The Mind of Robert Durst w/Attorney Kate

Content warning: This episode includes discussion of homicide, dismemberment, and domestic violence. Listener discretion advised. Robert Dur...

1:31:19Aug 6, 2026

What If You're Not the Problem You Think You Are in Your Relationship?

What if the reason difficult conversations feel so impossible isn’t because you’re too sensitive, too anxious, or bad at communicating? What...

1:09:45Jul 14, 2026

What Happens When You Stop Needing to Be Right - Certainty, Curiosity, and Emotional Immaturity

Certainty isn't confidence. Often it's armor over deep insecurity—and it's how emotional immaturity and narcissism hide in plain sight. In t...

1:07:10Jun 24, 2026

What You Don't Know You Don't Know About Meditation (Hint: You Can’t Stop Thoughts or Clear Your Mind!)

Mindfulness isn't about emptying your mind or finally feeling calm—and believing it was is probably why you quit. Your emotions fire before...

1:44:30Jun 12, 2026

Murder on the Couch: When "I Did It For You" Is a Lie

A heads-up before you press play: this is a bonus crossover from my true crime podcast, Murder on the Couch, dropping into your Virtual Couc...

1:00:38Jun 4, 2026

When Forgiveness Is for Them, and Acceptance Is for You — Why You Can't Let Go

You can't forgive a narcissistic or emotionally immature partner—and you think that makes you a bad person. It doesn't. For anyone who's bee...

1:10:20May 27, 2026

"Okay, You Win" Means They're Just Getting Started: A Narcissistic Letter, Decoded

After almost 30 years, she finally told her narcissistic husband she wanted out. His response was a multi-page letter that sounds like love...

0:59:32May 12, 2026

Death By 1,000 Cuts Pt. 11: Termites, Not Earthquakes, Destroy the Foundation

You're not surviving an earthquake in your narcissistic relationship. You're surviving termites—slow, structural damage no one else can see....

0:48:09Apr 27, 2026

They Know What They're Doing—They Just Don't Think It's Wrong (My Big Reveal)

"He wasn't evil." Those three words from actor Christoph Waltz, from an interview on how he prepared himself to play one of the most brutal,...

1:00:17Apr 14, 2026

They Didn't "Technically" Lie - How a Kernel of Truth is Weaponized

Ever lost an argument you know you should have won — but couldn't explain why? That's not a coincidence. It's a strategy called "The Pop." T...

1:04:13Mar 24, 2026

You're Not Bad. You're Carrying the Problem: Shame, Triggers, and Healing

"I was triggered" vs. "I chose"—what if both are true, and neither gets to the real problem? When a listener sent Tony a viral video challen...

0:54:09Mar 6, 2026

Your Memory Has Been Turned Against You: Lying, Gaslighting, and Confabulation (Oh My!)

Your memory has been turned—and the double agent is inside your own mind. After years in a relationship with someone emotionally immature or...

0:58:57Feb 25, 2026

Validation, Co-regulation, and Emotional Immaturity (with a Hint of Spirituality) w/Angela De Hoyos, ALC

What happens when your greatest strengths—your empathy, your willingness to self-reflect, your sensitivity—become the very tools someone use...

0:52:46Feb 16, 2026