4:8 Being Present with Disappointment: an IFS Perspective
In this episode, Susan explores what happens when our children are disappointed, upset, or frustrated — and why our instinct to fix, minimiz...
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Kids & family
Parenting Without Power Struggles
Susan Stiffelman is a family therapist, parent coach, and one of the country's premiere parenting experts, and the author of Parenting Without Power Struggles and Parenting With Presence (an...
Episodes
20 of 108 episodes
4:7 After the Anger: An IFS Look at Repair
In this episode, Susan explores what happens after Lawyer or Dictator mode has taken over and you've lost your cool. She explains why the go...
4:6 An IFS Look at Power Struggles: Captain, Lawyer, or Dictator?
In this episode, Susan connects Internal Family Systems to three modes she's taught for years: Captain, Lawyer, and Dictator. Using a real d...
4:5 Tormentor or Mentor? An IFS Reframe on Parenting's Tough Moments
In this episode, Susan unpacks Richard Schwartz's term "tor-mentor" — the idea that our children, in the moments they frustrate us most, are...
4:4 The Perfectionist, Controller & People Pleaser: Your Manager Parts Explained
Susan continues her Parenting Without Power Struggles series on Internal Family Systems, introducing "manager" parts. A healthy manager keep...
4:3 Calming Rage With IFS: Helping Protective Parts Relax
Susan continues her Parenting Without Power Struggles series on Internal Family Systems, exploring how "firefighter" parts trigger intense r...
4:2 Blindsided by Rage: An IFS Look at Firefighter Parts
In this episode, Susan explores what Internal Family Systems (IFS) calls "firefighter" parts — protective parts that flood in with fast, int...
4:1 Calm, Confident, Clear: Anchoring to Your Wise Self
In this episode, Susan introduces the core idea behind Internal Family Systems and what it means for parenting: beneath our anxiety, anger,...
1: 71 Encore episode: A Conversation With Dr. Kristin Neff
In this conversation, Susan and Dr. Kristin Neff talks about the importance of cultivating both fierce and tender self-compassion, offering...
1:79 Co-Parenting with a Narcissist, with Dr. Ramani Durvasula
In this episode, Susan talks with Dr. Ramani Durvasula, author of author of the new book, It's Not You: Identifying and Healing from Narciss...
2:10 Five Principles of Parenting with Aliza Pressman
Susan talks with Dr. Pressman about the five guiding principles for raising a good human: relationships, reflection, regulation, rules, and...
3:48 The Uncomfortable Path to Resilience
Resilience isn't a trait kids either have or don't — it's something they build through repeated experiences of feeling hard emotions and get...
3:46 "I Didn't Mean to Say That!"
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3:45 Captain of the Ship Meets IFS
In this episode, Susan is joined by Lisa Spiegel, author of Internal Family Systems Therapy with Children , for a conversation about how und...
3:44 When Kids Turn to Chatbots for Emotional Support
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3:43 Sparks of Joy in Everyday Parenting
In this podcast, Susan explores the quiet, everyday joy that often gets lost in the stress, demands, and constant pressures of parenting—and...
3:42 ADHD, with Dr. Ned Hallowell
In this episode, Susan and Dr. Hallowell share tips for talking with children about ADHD that emphasizes its benefits rather than using a "j...
3:41 Parenting With Less Drama and More Connection
In this episode, Susan explores what power struggles really are, why they arise so instinctively, and how parents can step out of them by em...
3:40 Raising Kids Who Can Handle Differences with Kelsey Blahnik
Susan speaks with clinician and author Kelsey Blahnik about her new book The AND Way, a model that helps people navigate tension while stayi...
3:39 Raising Resilience: Parenting Without Rescue
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