You vs. You: Why Inner Conflict Makes Everything Harder with Dana Bernstein

Ever find yourself stuck in an endless loop of overthinking, self-doubt, or battling between what you want and what you "should" do? To get to the heart of this inner tug-of-war, today, I'm joined by Dana Bernstein, principal of Dare to Live Brave and author of It's the Thought that Counts: Mastering the Art of YOU vs. You. Dana is a conflict resolution coach, helping professionals in high-stakes environments like universities, government, banking, and the court system. We're talking real-life inner conflict between ambition and self-doubt, or when your values feel like they're battling for control. Dana breaks down why labeling our emotions is magic and how knowing exactly what drives you can shift everything about how you show up, not just in tough conversations, but in your biggest moments. Join us if you're ready for powerful stories, actionable steps, and plenty of aha moments to reclaim your power and move forward as your most empowered, graceful self (even in the messiest moments) to the big, bold life you envision. Show Highlights: Understanding competing values in the "YOU vs. You" conflict. [02:40] Inner conflict in women and why self-discovery matters. [04:13] Discover your best self with leveraged values and "Who" words. [05:22] How to "pause, ponder, pivot" when you feel triggered. [07:05] The rider, elephant and peanuts analogy for emotions and reasoning. [08:19] Practicing the pause effectively and advance preparation. [11:10] In-the-moment conflict vs. after-the fact conflict. [13:52] The power of self-mastery over negotiation in conflict resolution. [15:31] What do you feed your mind, ice cream vs. bananas? [19:09] Using body awareness as early warnings of conflict activation. [23:23] Self-compassion and living clean between your ears. [24:58] To take the Who assessment: To find Danas book:

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You vs. You: Why Inner Conflict Makes Everything Harder with Dana Bernstein is an episode from Brilliant Balance by Cherylanne Skolnicki.

This episode is 26:23 long.

This episode was published on Feb 24, 2026.

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